Rowan's Reviews

This is Ro-Dawg.  No time to go long on this blog.  Ro-Dawg has to get back in the crib before momma wakes up and freaks out. 

1) Role Models:  NOT GOOD AT ALL.  On the Rowan Movie Scale (RMS), it gets a 4 R-Star (Rowan Star).  This movie wasn't as funny as previews showed and it had tons of cussing.  Rolicious doesn't want to see and elder 8 year old dropping those inappropriate and unmanly words.  Daddy BP and Mommy Erin turned this movie off after the first 20 minutes.  Ro-Dawg was ready to turn it off after 10 minutes.  It would get a lower than 4 R-Star but when it comes on USA or TBS and some of the cussing is deleted out, it may be worth watching. 

2) Hurt Locker:  GOOD MOVIE.  Rowan gives it a 7 R-Star.  This movie won best picture but Ro-Train wouldn't put it in his top 10 movie list yet (and know Ro-Train's top 10 doesn't consist of Barney or Hotel for Dogs).  Rowan thought the overall plot wasn't that strong but evidently that is what the director (James Cameron's ex-wife - a little extra Roknowledge free of charge) was going for.  The plot consisted of filming an army bomb squad for the remaining 30ish days of their rotation in Iraq.  And then it showed how one of the main characters handled being at home during his time off.  Rowan has no plans of owning this movie but would not be against watching it again.

3) Old Dogs:  REALLY GOOD MOVIE:  Rowan gives this movie a 8 R-Star.  This movie will not win any academy awards but is a clean and funny family movie.  John Travolta and Robin Williams were on their comedy A-game.  Sometimes it was over the top which Rolicious doesn't usually like in comedies but for some reason this one didn't annoy Rolicious.  Maybe it was the rainy day.  Who knows.  Anyway, Rowan will definitely watch this movie again and if it ever came on sale would buy it.

There you go, your first installment of Rowan's Reviews.  Ro-Dawg guesses he needs to detail out his R-Star rating system.  Hmmmm, not now though.  Diapers got full and Rowan hears momma moving...got to jet.

Friday Update and the Tank Project

GOOD FRIDAY MORNING TO YOU ALL!!!!

So first things first.  Rolicious would like to apologize for not continuing on his Rowan's Reviews.  He said they may be up today but no promises.  He has evidently inherited the "I hate blogging gene but sometimes get bored or just gets a random itch to do it" from his dad. 

Sidebar:  BP sees blogging as a supply and demand mechanism.  BP as the blogger supplies the information and the demand is fulfilled by comments.  So if you notice, BP's hatred goes up and down by the demand.  Why waste time and blog when no one really cares enough to leave a 30 second comment. Now from browsing the blog world, some have no perception of a supply and demand and blog about the most random items that receive no comments because no one stays on the blog long enough to scroll down to hit the comment button.  Evidently BP has entered this arena also. 

Anyway, onto BP and Erin and the Tank Project

Erin:  Erin got some unfavorable news last Friday at her doctor's appointment.  He told her 2 more weeks.  Now Erin has been hearing that for around a month and half.  But she has been a trooper and handle far better than BP could have so Sweets, your hubby is proud of you!!

Side Bar:  So BP just told Erin that he was proud of her on a blog that she never reads and really no one needs.  How funny is that.  Oh the stuff we put on blogs.

Back to Erin:  So Erin was pretty much healed up last week except for one tiny spot so the doc wouldn't give her the go ahead to resume all normal activity.  Anyway, that spot as of 2 nights ago is healed up!!  However, the doc said keep doing the same things until he sees it again so nurse BP continues to push the bounderies of amateur nursing.  Anyway, Erin gets a huge night out on the town next Friday night to celebrate her being healed.

BP:  Finished the Tank project.  Hope Tank Dawg is proud of BP. 

Ro-Dawg:  Rolled over for first time last night!!!!!  Kills BP that he just learned to roll-over but already knows how to blog.

Random Updates:  NONE

TANK PROJECT: Not too bad. First item daddy BP has built so it can be done better next time after this experience.  BP did buy the cheapest wood so some of the wood knots just can't be fixed even with paint.

How it started

30 minutes later

3 weeks later in actual time but really 4 hours later if it was done in same day.  Lazy, you say.  BP thinks not. 

 

BP's helper

Ro-Train on his new shelf

The final product

Friday Pic's

BP hit his normal mindset of "BP hates blogging" again recently and BP would apologize for not posting much lately but lets face it, who really cares.

But BP is here to make your Friday GRAND!!!!  For those of you that just can't make it through the day without updates from the PAYNES, today you can move and live.  Speaking of move, one of the greatest lyrics ever written by yours truly states "there is so much breathing room but I can barely move".  Not sure why writing the word "move" made BP think of Rob Thomas but it is probably because Rob Thomas rules.  If Rowan's first name was Rob, BP promises his middle name would have been Thomas!!

Ok, on with the show.
Erin Update:  Erin is 1 week away from being totally healed.  FINALLY!!!!  Unless something drastic happens in the next week (bad that is), Erin's wound should be healed sometime between now and next Friday.  Nurse BP says it looks very good and is smaller than an inch now!!  Erin has even started jogging (shhhhhhh, keep it on the down-lo, the doc said not to yet but Nurse BP said go for it).  So Erin has hyped up her workout with her "2nd Birthday", "Erin Is A Warrior Princess", "Rowan You Better Be Grateful for Life" shopping banaza that will happen in the coming months!!  The Paynes thank you all for the prayers!!!

Rowan Update:  Chillin like a villian!  Rowan has taken to his new nickname Rolicious and has asked for T-shirts to be printed up that say "I'm Rolicious, Come Get You Some!"  So stay tuned on those!!  He is enjoying going to bed while BP sings the Auburn fight song to him!  Some pics are below.

BP Update:  BP got flower beds 80% done this past saturday.  Get back to it tomorrow to hopefully finish up. He pulled up most of the bushes in the front to redo the main flower bed and after 3 loads of bark, the flower beds are covered.  He is 60% complete with his first Tank Project (named for Taylor and his mad carpenter skills).  The pic below don't the current status of the shelf.  BP and Erin's #4 cow is about to have her first calf...hopefully all goes well!!

Copper Update:  Has calm down a great deal but has found a Huskey to play with across the street.  Gets many woopings but evidently his mind doesn't process pain very well (or he is too stupid) and so he continues to go visit!  Most of the neighborhood knows him now by name.  Not sure if that is good or bad!

Paisely Update:  Got groomed last Saturday and just holding down the fort.  Tries to help out with Rowan when she is not sleeping!

Yosementi Update:  Still missed everyday!!

Now for some pics

The start of the bookshelf

40 minutes later

Ro-Dawg: "What's up, you never seen a sexy baby body before?"

Ro-Dawg:  "Check the jogging suit out.  I know, pretty pimp right!"

Ro-Dawg: "Check out my cuz Perry Rose"

Ro-Dawg:  "That was funny mommy!"

Ro-Dawg:  "Some reason mom and dad can't remember my name so they put it on the wall even though dad messed up and didn't capture it in this sweet pick of me and mom.  Good job dad, NOT!"

Ro-Dawg:  "Paisley and yours truly watching mom and dad get ready."

Ro-Dawg:  "TD and me in our Easter outfits after church!!"

Happy Good Friday and Some Payne Updates

First, The Paynes want to wish everyone a Wonderful Good Friday.  Take the time today to truly remember what this day is.  BP doesn't do that enough.  We (including BP) take for granted what the Cross truly means.  It is so easy for our hearts to become numb and for the Cross to simply become a word to us.  How often do we truly let the word Cross pentetrate to the depths of our heart to unleash a love and spirit that is life changing.  It is like how we can say "I Love You" to our spouse, mother/father, brother, friend, etc so many times that it is unintentionally becomes a "habit" word.  It is not that we don't love them, because we do, but our day or days may have become so busy that we have become nume to how we can truly show them that we love them.  We have walked onto the path of taking our love and their love for granted.  And in the same way the word Cross can so easily become the same thing.  Sure we speak of it but do we cling to the word everyday?  Do we let it break us everyday?  Or do we simply say "God thank you for the Cross" and carry own without truly taking a moment from the day to let the love our God had for us that He laid down his life on that Cross to rebuild a doorway for us that we initially tore down.  The key word in that is HE.  Christ wasn't forced, wasn't tricked, wasn't bribed to lay down on that cross.  He willingly laid down. For BP, a reawakening to this fact needs to be present everyday.  So many times BP says "Thank you for the Cross" and doesn't look further into it.  It is like a kid unwrapping a present for Christmas but not taking it out of the box.  Sure, simply unwrapping makes the kid excited and he can see what it is from the advertisement on the box but the real excitment is the toy inside.  So not to compare the Cross to a toy but open the Cross up each day and get excited.  Let the real present of Christ defeating sin and death bring you a love that is loud.

Anyway, you can tell what is on BP's heart today.  Rick and Bubba played "Worth is the Lamb" this morning and what a moment that was....chills.

So onto some updates the quick and dirty way:
1) BP is building a book case for Ro-Dawg or as Rowan likes to call himself now (as you saw from his blog) Ro-licious.  BP feels like Tank Dawg now.  Pics will be coming.
2) Ro-Dawg is tearing some formula up now.  $60 per week and half.  Yeah, tell BP about it.
3) Erin is healing up very nicely now.  She has been going to a wound specialist in Albertville.  BP has actually been changing her gauzes now. 
4) Going to get Erin a china cabinet we found off Craigslist tomorrow morning.  BP is addicted to Craigslist.
5) Yard work and easter egg hunt on tap for tomorrow.
6) Cooper has been on vacation on the farm this week.  He called last night and said he ready to come home though.  Be there in the morning buddy!!!!
7) Looks like Belinda is going to be called Grana B or B for short!!!
8) Rowan, sorry Ro-licious, is blogging now.  BP restricting him on how much he blogs though but his Review of Role Models will be coming soon
9) Ro-Train is addicted to watching TV.  Is this bad? 
10) Go check out what is happening on Dr. Awesome.  http://gotmanswers.blogspot.com/
Some pretty funny stuff going on

More comedic relief later!!!

Rowan's Reviews

Greetings elders. This is Rowan Payne or as most of you know me “The Ro-Dawg Jesse James”. Yes that is the Ro-Dawg chilling on the mantle in the main picture of Daddy’s blog. The camera loves me as you can see!! You would be amazed by the number of arranged marriage proposals that Daddy has received for the Ro-Dawg. Evidently the Ro-Dawg has BSA (Baby Sex Appeal)!! Daddy has graciously allowed the Ro-Dawg to guest post on his blog. Rowan has been trying to get a guest post in since the family came home from the hospital. The Ro-Dawg perfected the crazy good writing skills during his dreaded nursery stay at Crestwood. Evidently it is quite easy to escape the Crestwood Nursery when you have the brain of Jesse James. The now famous picture of the Ro-Train (yes, Rowan is aware of the many nicknames he has) in only his diapers with shades on tanning away for the future ladies was really a double in some of the pics. The one and only Mr. Dedrik Collins was gracious enough to play a role in the Ro-Dawg’s brilliant nursery escapes. See, Washington DC (yes, Ro-Dawg also likes nicknames and speaking in 3rd person) was in the next crib in the nursery. After several conversations, it became very apparent that Washington DC and Ro-Train looked very much a like except for the eyes and cheeks. Washington DC was very pleased that he looked similar to Ro-Dawg. He knew it would pay off a lot in the long run when the girls started to line up. When one of the nurses tried to set the Ro-Dawg up on date with her 5 year old daughter, Washington DC’s eyes popped out of his head. It was then that he was hooked to the Ro-Dawg. However, it would pay off for the Ro-Dawg sooner. The light bulb had went off (not literally because actually there was a huge light bulb tanning the Ro-Dawg). With the big flippin sunglasses on, Washington DC could be Ro-Dawg. Sure, his parents freaked out several times and the one nurse lost her job when he came up missing several times, but who is laughing now. Without his sacrifice, the Ro-Dawg would not have been able to enhance his boxing, art, singing, and among others, writing skills. The plan was in place. Washington DC pretending and pulling off being Ro-licious (you like that nickname) was the hard part but it was accomplished. The escape route was the easy part. Ro-Dawg just sky dived out of the crib and unsnapped the o’ diaper and used it as a parachute. Sure, there was a little naked body for the whole world to see, but what a sight for the world to see!! The Ro-Dawg then snapped the diaper back on and hid in the cabinet portion of a crib exiting the nursery. The cribs that Ro-licious speaks of were actually plastic tubs on cabinets with wheels. Cheap but served their purpose. Before the crib reached its destination room, Ro-Dawg would double flip out and head to Daddy BP’s and Mommy Erin’s room. Then he would snatch Daddy BP’s laptop away while he slept and would hide in the shower and surfed away on the internet. Returning to nursery prison was a bit harder. Since the nursery door was adult proof locked, the Ro-Dawg had to become creative in getting back in. Hopefully your curiosity is hitting right now. The Ro-Dawg can’t speak of the exact plan on returning to nursery prison but lets just say it involved a dress, a bottle of milk, dancing the Romba, blowing a hole in the huggies diaper, and letting the cute baby eyes do the work.

It only took Ro-Dawg three nights to learn the how to type and what the purpose of the explorer icon on the desktop was for. Evidently knowing how to turn a computer on and play solitary was genetically installed in Ro-Dawg (yes, Ro-Dawg did finally beat Spider Solitar). Ro-Dawg was extremely surprised Mommy Erin never found him in the shower in the thousand nightly bathroom trips she took. Mommy is one of the most intelligent women Ro-Dawg knows but evidently when you combine Daddy and Mommy to form a Ro-Train, he is smarter than both of them. So anyway, that is where the Ro-Dawg developed his keen since of typing and read up on many movie scripts. The Ro-Dawg has approximately read over 1200 scripts. Ro-licious is quite the fast reader. Scripts ranging from Little Ms. Sunshine to Lassie to The 3 Ninjas to Lord of the Rings were read by yours truly. Ro-Dawg became very familiar with actors and their traits/abilities by Googling every actor that popped up in the scripts. Ro-licious then found the site called youtube.com where you can actually watch movies. What a time saver that was Ro-Dawg also watched approximately 200 movies thanks to youtube.com (how long has that site been around). You may ask where did this desire to learn movies come from. Great question, maybe because the womb is not sound proof and Ro-Dawg heard the hundreds of movies/TV shows that Mommy and Daddy watched while the sexy limbs on the Ro-Train’s body were. Only hearing sound will create a great desire to put pictures with the sounds and thus a desire to watch movies was born. A boy can only hear so much Reba before he wants to see what Reba looks like and yes, what a great show Reba is!! Combine this with evidently inheriting some movie gene from the parents and BOOM, you have a “super hero infant movie junkie”. So Ro-Dawg is going to begin a series of movie reviews called “Rowan’ Reviews”. If the Ro-Dawg gets enough feedback, Daddy said he would allow Ro-Dawg to start his own blog. It is not that Ro-Dawg doesn’t know how to type in blogspot.com and register a cool blog name like Ridiculously Right Reviews: A Blog By Ro-licious, but the Ro-Dawg is all about respecting Daddy BP’s wishes. After long hours of reading and watching movies, it didn’t take the Ro-Train long to realize that many movies are worth no more than the stinky brown stuff that Mommy and Daddy clean off my butt that STINKS.

So here we go. What makes a good movie for Ro-Dawg? That is simple. The Ro-Dawg presents one word many times to you: PLOT, PLOT, PLOT, PLOT, PLOT. Ro-Dawg doesn’t care if it is a love story, mystery, horror, thriller, etc as long as there is a PLOT!! Most movies lack a decent plot. Most movies have good ideas but don’t build on the plot. A perfect example is Jumper. Great idea, people capable of jumping through “time”; however, the director Doug Liman should have told the writers David Goyer and Jim Uhls that they forgot to take the necessary time to walk through the history of how this ability came into existence. Not much should be expected from David Goyer since his biggest claim to fame was the Blade series (which scared pee out of me, literally, peed all over myself in the shower). But Doug Liman was a part of the Bourne Identity series and those movies speak for themselves. So Doug, you should know better. Sure, Jumper gave a quick 5 minute Cliff note version but the Eric Note Version was needed. Eric note means the WHOLE VERSION and is also Ro-Dawgs middle name. This blog is a perfect example of Ro-Dawg’s belief in building upon the history. If Ro-Dawg just started in on the movie review for today without giving you the detailed version (Eric Note Version) of where his ability of being able to review movies came from, then no respect would be given. Heck there may not be much respect anyway since you are reading what a baby sitting in a diaper full of that stinky brown stuff is telling you. You may think Ro-Dawg is just a cute baby who can type which is fine. So the Ro-Dawg has watched every type of movie and even sometimes finds himself telling Mommy to put in love story movies such has Definitely Maybe while other times he stays up late to watch a man movie like Bangkok Dangerous with Daddy. By the way, that movie should have been called “Dang, This Movie Smells Like Poop”.

So that is the history of Ro-Dawg movie skills. The next post Daddy allows me to do will be an actual movie reviews. Ro-licious just wanted to give you some background and also promote his new nickname Ro-licious. The Ro-Dawg just vomited all over himself so Mommy is already on her way down the hall to clean this sexy baby up. Life is grand! Nothing better than someone cleaning up the poop that comes out of your butt and mouth!!! Stay crazy blog readers, the Ro-Dawg will be back soon!!

Ro-licous is out!!

BP's Love Needs One

Two blogs for the price of one.  Merry Christmas indeed!!!

So BP been thinking.  Erin has not real nickname.  Sure BP calls her Sweets 90% of time but everyone knows how BP loves nicknames and even though he will continue to call Erin "Sweets" and "Beautiful", it is only fitting that the wife of the Nickname King have a true nickname.  Heck, everyone else has one and some more

1) Taylor - Tank Dawg, T, Tay Tay
2) Amanda - Bowenowens
3) Rowan - Ro-Dawg Jesse James, Ro-Train
4) Adam - Da Bull
5) Ashley - Mother Hen
6) Kyle - Da Bile, Triple
7) Laura - Lmac
8) Chad - C-Dawg
9) Bradely - B-Dawg
10) Scott - crap, does scott have a true nickname.  BP use to call him TP
11) Laura Beth - LB
12) Brian - Sheffer
13) Mellissa - Mel
14) Plot - Pluto
15) Danielle - D
16) Matthew - Woodrow
17) Whit - Bud
18) Haley - Hales (even though BP still forgets the correct spelling of his SIL first name)
19) Adrian - A..D..R..I..A..N (yell it out like in Rockey)
20) Bridgett - Bridge
21) Leslie - ?? maybe Les
22) Tucker - TD
23) Brandon - BP, Kitty
24) Albert - Albo

anyway, BP's peeps get the point.  So what should Erin's be?  Heck what should Scott's be?  Heck do you even like your current nickname.  Let BP know but don't expect BP to quit calling you by your nickname unless you threaten him :)

Nicknames are great.  They are to us what belly rubs are to dogs...dogs don't need them but dogs sure do like them!!!  Belly rubs put smiles on dogs faces like the correct nickname does for humans.  You know BP speaks the truth!!!!

Lets do this

Erin "aka ????"
Scott "aka ????"
You "aka ???"

Let your voice be heard
**DISCLAIMER**
Erin does not like the nickname Mrs. Kitty.  Ask Albo about Erin's reaction to him calling her Mrs. Kitty.  Ask BP what Erin said in the car and other times when Mrs. Kitty was brought up.  Please keep BP safe and keep this nickname buried.

Nothing Much Except HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERIN!!

So there isn't much for BP to update on or really, he just lacks the desire to.  But what do famous people often say...."I'm pretty"...no no, that is not it...."I must give the public what they demand"...yeah that is it....BP must give the public what they demand.  Ok, ok, BP knows there isn't much demand for the blog but in his dream world he actually thinks some read it.  So to the dreamers out there, this is for you!!

It is Erin's Birthday this saturday.  And yes BP capitalizes Birthday (and also ignores Mrs. Moore (English teacher) basic grammar rules of never starting a sentence with AND...also BP thinks parenthesis in parenthesis is not allowed either.......focus here BP..back to matter at hand) because Birthdays are holidays in the Payne household.  BP knows certain people (aka Da Bull) will pee their pants on that concept but that is how the Payne's role.  So Erin wanted a huge shopping spree for her Birthday and that is what she is going to get.  However, since post pregnancy has not went to plan, with the wound and all, Erin wants to wait until later to break out the shopping spree.  So really Erin is going to have 2 Birthday (aka Erin Holidays).  One will be Saturday and won't be filled with many presents and one will come in a May and be filled with presents of clothes GALORE!!!!  So with Erin a Happy Birthday or a Happy Erin Birthday!!!!!

Rowan Update:  Rowan is downing a lot of the Neutragema still.  That mug can eat but when you are the Ro-Dawg Jesse James and trying to grow some dread locks, you have to eat a lot.  Ro-Train is also smiling a lot and is on the verge of laughing.  Soon he will be logging on to BP's computer and setting up the web came to laugh with Grana and Grandaddy Pokey!!

Brandon took off last Friday to start outside yard work in the beautiful weather.  He is ripping up bushes in the flower beds and replanting new bushes, re-seeding the yard, fertlizing the yard, and more stuff. 

Coop City (aka Cooper) is losing his winter coat and still roaming the neighborhood and Paisley is being the pimp lady dawg that she is and playing very nicely with Rowan!!!!  Thanks for asking!!

Until next time, stay happy dreamers!!